There’s a lot that doesn’t get discussed when we deal with pain, conflict, or when people hurt us. Oftentimes we end up burying our feelings, or staying angry. But this is so toxic for your mental and emotional health.

These six steps are CRUCIAL for healing when we’ve been hurt. They have helped me to recover from a lot of pain and anguish and I talk about some of that in this video here.

Here are the six steps to recovering from the hurt that I discuss on the video:

1. Don’t lash out and hurt back.

Hurting people do tend to hurt people. It’s kind of a natural reaction to get emotional and react negatively. So it’s important to be really careful how you react.

2. Recognize what you’ve done wrong, if anything at all, and apologize for it.

So if you do react negatively, make sure you recognize it and apologize for it. If you did something wrong, don’t be prideful! Humble yourself and genuinely apologize for it.

A lot of times we get so angry that don’t feel like we’ve done anything wrong. Well if it’s a conflict that you want to resolve, there definitely needs to be some apologies given out – on both sides.

But this is the most important thing I want to say about this step: If you’re a victim that is dealing with the pain of someone seriously hurting you (ie. abuse, rape, etc..), then you MUST recognize that YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. You need to come to the realization that you are not responsible for the actions of the other person.

3. Embrace and experience the pain that this causes you.

A lot of times we tend to bury, ignore, or brush off pain. This is very harmful to you mentally and emotionally. Whether it’s for a few hours or days, you need to take some times to embrace the pain and how it makes you feel.

4. Vent your feelings.

This is the time to let out the anger, frustration, and the pain. Let it all out verbally, vs. letting it fester inside. This is such a crucial step in releasing the negativity. It’s okay to scream, cry, or hit your pillow. LET THAT TOXICITY OUT!

5. Talk with someone like a therapist or trusted friend/advisor.

Sometimes the simple act of talking something out really helps, but the other person’s perspective and thoughts can also really help.

6. Cleanse your mind, body, and spirit.

This is when you embrace positivity, gratitude, and spend some time in prayer/meditation. Whatever you need to do to center yourself again so that you can move forward in positivity and freedom, DO THAT.

Lastly, I’d like to say this: You are never responsible for how someone else behaves, but you are responsible for your own thoughts and actions. Be good to yourself by being intentional in working through pain and hurt. You deserve to heal and be happy.

I hope you find this helpful, and I’d love to know your thoughts and/or tips on how to heal when someone hurts you. And if you know someone that would benefit from reading this post or watching my video, please share it with them!

Blessings my friends,